Aizen’s Top 5 Conspiracy Theories

CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER 1: Ryuuji’s father is actually Yasuko’s brother.

I read this in 4chan and had to laugh about it… but then it was possible. I mean, Yasuko’s mother and father have features similar to Ryuuji’s. Here’s what I’m going to say: Most Anime characters have been made before and as a result they all look like. They are only different at the fact that they are a main character in a specific series. Still, I’m kind of still amazed that three girls love him yet he refuses to go polygomy. I mean, who wouldn’t want some Ami? Tsundere loli is good as well, but Taiga just doesn’t seem the same as Felli ¹. BUT I DIGRESS! No, Ryuuji’s father is actually a gangster who fucked Yasuko, got her pregnant, and then left her for some other slut. I’m not trying to poke fun at it at all because it really sucks for a single mother to be so abused by a jackass, have his child, AND live alone without her own parents. I just had to feel sorry for poor old Ya-chan. I wonder why she was even into such guys? She could have did it with some honest, nice guy but I guess that nice guy never was able to finish what the jackass started.  Though, it really does explain that Ryuuji’s father is actually a gangster. In the hentai gaming world, Ryuuji would have already had sex with Minori and Ami + made them pregnant and shit. I’m just saying that that’s what would happen and you all know it. SO THIS CONSPIRACY HAS BEEN PROVEN FALSE!

CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER 2: Inko didn’t die after saying his name because he’s really a cat ².

Well, Inko was never able to say his name in the twenty four episodes I’ve seen. Episode twenty five, the last episode, was so typical as to give the audience a surprise — Inko saying his name and NOT dying! What the hell’s with that? I thought it was an agreed concept that right after a retarded parrot says his name, he will burn into ashes be wiped off the face of the earth! What happened there?! Is it because he’s really a cat in disguise and as a result still has 8 or so more lives left? That’s ridiculous! For all the people who were disappointed — I feel your pain.

CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER 3: Ryuuji got in Taiga’s pants the night he kissed her passionately.

I believe it’s very possible. Going into symbolism a little bit, when Taiga returned to school she’s wearing black — SHE HAS BEEN TAINTED!  But as to if he really did do it, there’s no real proof. He did spend the night with her, though. And they did both know they loved one another. So it’s really possible. My opinion, though, is that they did get it on during that night. Ryuuji’s a youthful guy and youthful guys normally like to get it on with girls ³. But as this show isn’t a hentai, it has to be a NO ⁴!

CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER 4: What ever happened to Minori’s $$$ that she gave to Ryuuji?

Well, we all know that Taiga and Ryuuji never really eloped… so what happened to all that cash? I for one won’t believe that it was all spent on the train and such. It’s just impossible. Plus, we all know that Ryuuji went straight back to school a few days after they left school to elope. I mean, with that money Ryuuji and Taiga can go to a lot of fancy hotels to bring up the mood. Or they could buy some viagra or something. I DON’T KNOW! I’m just trying to be creative here. My newest theory yet is that there’s an empty episode where Taiga was up for auction as a slave because her father was out of business and so Ryuuji wanted to buy her.

CONSPIRACY THEORY NUMBER 5: Kitamaru is actually gay.

Some might have contemplated if he’s gay or not and really I don’t know. I’ve always thought that he was moderately heterosexual but after all the things he’s done in this show I can’t say. I mean, he might like that president and want to follow her to the ends of the earth, but at the same time he goes around school half naked and allows guys to touch his body. What the hell does that really tell you?

Some symbols I thought I saw:

Star

Minori might have said what the producers felt, but it didn’t say what I thought when I saw her looking at it (and before Minori ever opened her goddamn mouth). To me, a star is. A star is shiny, or beautiful. A star is innocent. A star is is the main character of a show. A star can be alone or with a lot of friends. In fact, a star is something unreachable. Does that sound a lot like someone? Yes! It sounds like Taiga the next day. She became unreachable to everyone by leaving them. At the same time, everyone called her as she was the star of the show – the star of their lives as well. She chose to be alone, but later also stayed with a lot of friends. She’s just a little innocent girl who any guy would like to fap at ⁵. Well, that’s my intepreration of a star. There are probably way more things to it but that’s all I thought of at the time.

Two Birds

When are two birds sitting next to each other? When they’re in love with one another, perhaps? But let’s think back a bit… Does anyone even know how love birds look like? Well, Wikipedia it. Now, if you look at how a love bird looks like it looks REALLY similar to the goddamn bird Ryuuji keeps. Does that mean Ryuuji kept Inko NOT to have some lulz at his demise but instead for him to somehow cause love to be brought to his household? Perhaps Ryuuji wanted Minori in the beginning, but because a killer loli popped in that meant the fate was already set. That fucking bird destroyed Ryuuji’s possible relationship with Ami and instead threw a loli at him. THAT IS FINE TOO. I’m not hating on that I just think a loli girlfriend would be pretty… awkward. I mean, think about it: If you’re on a date and someone sees you eating with a loli, you’ll go straight to jail. Just saying. Oh how I was trolled by Toradora. And no, whoever says “Toradorable!” needs to get shot in the crouch, get sodomized by a bunch of screwdrivers, have all his limbs amputated via explosives, and etc. There is no fucking thing as “Toradorabable” and whoever says that is just the same as a fucking Narutard who masturbates at a Naruto before and after he transforms into a slut. I’m sorry but I had to let that out as well — as one of my “End of <series>” thoughts.

Final Rating: 9/10

I can’t give it a 10/10. I can’t bring myself to it even though the ending was pretty great, but I didn’t get to see too much Ryuuji x Taiga or my all-so-desired Ryuuji x Ami moment. Plus, it didn’t end with me feeling that it was really the end like how Code Geass did — it made me feel that there’s more to it, like it was ended prematurely. Hell, this show should be strethched another 27 episodes or so. But regardless, it was pretty much worth it to actually watch this show. It was as enthralling as Code Geass but it was indeed enthralling. And also, I don’t think Toradora would really be the sort of Anime which you can watch, constantly, for 6 hours like Code Geass. Code Geass was cool in the aspect that it kept on enthralling me every episode to want more. Toradora made me feel more like, “I can watch it… or I can do something else.”

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Annotations

1. Felli from Chrom Shelled Regios [↩]
2. In other words, Inko has 9 frick'in lives. [↩]
3. Including at Ryuuji's current age. [↩]
4. BUT it can still happen — it's a conspiracy! [↩]
5. Here, you sick pedophillic bastards. [↩]

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